Thursday, March 12, 2009

A Hawaiian Honeymoon

6:00 pm May 7, 1988. Our wedding reception was scheduled to go from 4-6. An afternoon party was what we (I) had in mind. It was fun, we looked great, and we were married. I was so happy that I hadn't stopped smiling since well...Cycle Guy picked me up at 7am. (He wasn't Cycle Guy then, he was Student Guy) I'm sure I started smiling the moment I opened my parents front door to see him standing there ready and willing to marry me that morning.

Cycle Guy doesn't like being the center of attention (or even next to the attention, why did he marry me?) so this special day was a little uncomfortable for him.

Before the actual ceremony, the gentleman who married us asked us to look into each others eyes (in front of all of our friends and family? awkward...) So we stared obediently while he talked about the wonderful journey we were about to embark upon. Cycle Guy likes me and I felt a little less awkward after he winked.

Pictures at the temple. Luncheon. Pictures before the reception. Reception. Six PM. End of the reception?

It was time for the reception to be over. People were still around. We were ready to be done with the party and start the honeymoon. Cycle Guy gave me a look. A look like the one Kip gave LaFawnda when she knew it was time to ride off into the sunset on the horse Napoleon gave them as a wedding gift. Cycle Guy was ready to ride off into the sunset so... We left.

No more newlyweds. No good-byes. No rice. No confetti.

Early the next morning we flew to Hawaii with a first class upgrade. At that time I worked in the travel industry. Great benefits! He was a student, we were not rich. But because of my job it was cheaper for us to go to Hawaii (first class) than the local Motel 6. I know! Great benefits!

Go back in time six weeks... Jenny,"I'd like to make a reservation for one of your condos on May 8 for three nights. This is for my honeymoon, do you have a travel agent special?" Agent, "Oh congratulations! We have a special condo with a loft and we can give it to you for $19.00 a night." "Great! We'll take it!" Wow. How could it get any better than this. Hawaii for $19.00 a night. A first class flight And a LOFT! Visions of grandeur dancing in my little head.

My next call was to order a special Hawaii welcome for my new husband (at the time I couldn't use the word husband. Eeww) Cycle Guy would receive a lei and a kiss as he exited the plane just like The Brady Bunch. Polynesian Beauties waiting in grass skirts and colorful leis, I was sooo excited!

Reserve a rental car and my honeymoon was planned.

We were so happy to arrive. The air was humid and smelled delicious. "Let's go get our luggage and the car so we can get to the condo." Cycle Guy was excited to get out of the airport. I kept stalling...where were the Polynesian Beauties? Looking around, walking slowly, stalling... weren't they supposed to meet him as he walked off the plane? Bad enough that we didn't get off outside like the Brady's.

Argh.

E v e n t u a l l y, a lady (maybe she was Polynesian?) held up a sign with his name on it. We walked over to her and she handed him a lei and a card. No kiss, No draping the lei over his head. Well, Tatoo, we're not on Fantasy Island! And our name is definitely NOT Brady.

The Condo Company sent me a hand written map to their property. People told us repeatedly that Oahu is easy to navigate and we wouldn't have any problems. Faithfully we picked up the car and drove to the North Shore. My navigation skills were in their beginning stages. After six u-turns and our first impatient teeth gritting experience together we found the right road. Three u-turns after that we found the right condo.

We finally found our destination and we were on our honeymoon!

Ahhh, as we walked in we discovered a fruit basket on the table and a very nice card from management. Nice.

Where's the loft? Where's the bed? Back track... front door, tiny kitchen, fruit basket, bathroom, maybe that door goes to the loft? nope, closet. Living room, couch, sliding door to deck. No Loft? No Bed? I know I told them this was our honeymoon. Do you have to ask for a bed when you reserve a condo? I know they told me there would be a loft. No Bed? This was our honeymoon. Did I mention we couldn't find a bed?

Then Cycle Guy opened the closet. "What the... what is this? Is this a Murphy Bed?" Apparently the Hawaiian word for Murphy Bed is Loft. At least it was a bed. I think I saw Paige Davis use a Loft (Murphy Bed) on Trading Spaces once.

A fellow travel agent had given us directions to what she said was the most beautiful beach we would ever see. It would be a little hard to find. We already knew we didn't find things well together. Should we chance it? The next day after some rest, we decided to try. What's a Hawaiian Honeymoon without a perfect beach?

She had warned us that there was not a parking lot and that you had to hike through some trees to get there. (I don't know, should we have seen warning signs in all this?) The view was amazing. Majestic White Beaches. There were even some tents set up against the cliff. Cool, you can do that? As we walked out onto the beach we noticed a man dropping his pants as he walked toward the water. WHAT? Then we looked a little closer at the people. None of them were wearing anything. Another look from Cycle Guy. This one said, "Don't laugh til we get through the trees."

There must be something good about starting a marriage laughing. Twenty-one years later we've learned how to navigate (mostly. The GPS helps). We don't own a loft or a murphy bed and we've never been to another nude beach. And when our 18 year old son borrowed Dad's old sport coat he found a little card in the pocket welcoming Cycle Guy to Hawaii.

Life is good. (Better when you laugh!)

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This post is my entry for the Because Mom said so...That's Why contest Have Travel Will Story. I want to go on a trip to Connecticut and visit Rhonda and her family. So now your job is to go to her web site on Saturday and vote (well, you can vote for mine if it makes it into the top four anyway) I'm certain the stories will all be fun to read!


16 comments:

Mike J said...

Oh, I remember it like it was just yesterday or was it 21 years ago. I'm still a little shocked that we couldn't find the bed in our condo for at least 20 minutes. Those Hawaiians are sneaky.

The Mothership said...

That is hilarious. You should frame that card and hang it up in your house! I can't believe you just left your reception - awesome.

Funny how things never really go like you plan them, but you can't imagine it any other way in the end.

Goings on at the Glenn's said...

That was fun to read. Hawaii sounds so fun and the bed thing was hilarious. You are a good writeer.
I get some of those looks from Dan once in awhile too. Our honeymoon was an adventure too with a econo lodge experience. It was quite memorable. :) I'll have to tell you about it sometime.

Anonymous said...

I don't think I've ever heard you tell this story!!! It's hilarious - you have my vote!

Dawn said...

Whew! Can you believe that was 21 years ago and four kids later? Well you survived that beach without laughing in their -- ah -- faces.

Rhonda said...

Jenny, I see where I missed sending you the official email. I need your email address. If you go to my blog, my email address is there.

Sorry. I will explain how that happened. Don't worry, you are entered into the contest. You are all official, no worries. I just need your email.

Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Jenny, I just read it again and it's even funnier the second time around! I'm telling everybody else to read it too. You're great!

Jenny-Jenny said...

Thanks JoLyn. I hope its not too long. I just couldn't leave out any of those wonderful? details.

Joy said...

What a great and unforgettable story. You all got married just before we did (June 1988). My honeymoon story involved too much throwing up (in Mexico) I'm still trying to forget it. :)
I'm glad you all had a good time on yours.

Joy

Anonymous said...

I love this story. You've got my vote.
Katie

Anonymous said...

I LOVED your story! Thanks for starting my day off with a laugh!
-Roxane

peterandholly said...

What a great story!!! Thanks so much for sharing it will me. You have my vote! :) Holly

Anonymous said...

Only read the last sentence. It was a great sentence!

LVP said...

Good Job. I hope you win.

Joy For Your Journey said...

Just passing through reading the travel stories. I loved your story, it was very cute. But can't say I feel bad for anyone who gets to spend their honeymoon on the north shore of Oahu--even if they can't find the bed. :-) Especially when my honeymoon consisted of moving from Utah to Mexico City with me crying all the way. Not exactly beginning with a laugh. But we have laughed a lot since then.:-)

Anonymous said...

LOVED IT JENNY! oh my goodness i hope you win, because that was really funny!!